Kozol tells
a multilayered story about himself and his father, a distinguished physician
who becomes increasingly demented by Alzheimer’s disease, starting at age 88. A neurologist, Dr. Harry Kozol is able to diagnose with great specificity his own disease.
Son Kozol describes his father’s initial
symptoms and the slow decline, a direction that is sadly and fatefully, clear. The
son goes on walks with him, describes their conversations, arranges for paid
companions, and puzzles about what must be “a life beneath the life” of his
progressively inarticulate father.
Over the 14
years of this illness, there are some medical mishaps—including problems in
continuity of care—depletion of the family’s money, and Jonathan’s hesitation
to use a DNR (Do Not Resuscitate) order for his father or for his aging mother.
He writes of his doubts, uncertainties, and mixed emotions. When his father is
actively dying, Kozol dawdles elsewhere with lists and papers “obsessively.” He
understands this, in retrospect, as denial. Nevertheless he arrives at the
hospital and places his ear on his father’s chest, hearing breaths come slower
and slower until death. Dr. Kozol dies in 2008 at the age of 102.
Alternating
with this story are long passages about Dr. Kozol’s professional life,
including his work with Eugene O’Neill and family, also Patty Hearst and Albert
DeSalvo (“The Boston Strangler”). For the latter two, he is an expert witness
in court cases. These passages illustrate his many skills, tenacity, and
ideals. A 25-page Epilogue
written a half a dozen years later casts a different light on the father-son
relationship. While the bulk of the book shows a loving, respectful
relationship, the Epilogue describes tensions and disagreements between the two
from Jonathan’s childhood to later years. The father criticizes what he perceives as failures, lack of ambition, poor
choices, and the like. Kozol describes his own illustrious career, often in
directions his father disapproves. In later years, however, Kozol accepts some
of his father’s advice and understands their status more as equals. In another
seven years, however, Dr. Kozol’s mind starts its difficult path, and the son becomes
the caregiver to the father.
